I love how God uses horses to talk to people with the ministry of FBEAP. And honestly, I learn just as much in every session as those coming for help. I am so grateful that God truly uses wounded healers, people who don’t always know the answers but know the one who does. I am one of those. A few weeks ago we had our first Restlands Retreat, and to be totally honest, I felt overwhelmed and a little too busy in the beginning. I did not like that feeling and thought it ironic that the whole theme of the retreat was resting in Jesus. SMH. Why don’t I just get it sometimes?! I was a little too busy to stop and think about it, probably. I am a work in progress.
Anyway, during the FBEAP portion of our retreat I broke the large group into smaller groups of three and each group was asked to think together on what their biggest obstacle was to resting in the Lord. One group said their biggest obstacle was themselves. After they shared a little, I asked them to build an obstacle for the horses that represented how they are an obstacle to rest. They put a jump up against the fence and when I approached their group about what they want the horse to do with it. They said “destroy it” and “kick it!” So I brought a horse over and handed it off to one of the ladies and the horse immediately started… grazing. One of the ladies started tapping on the jump trying to get the horse’s attention that way, but the horse casually insisted on the grass. The same woman who was doing the tapping started to giggle to herself and said “I do this all the time in my relationship with the Lord.” Wow! I could totally resonate. How often do we try to move into rest with all our might and tell the Lord, in all our wisdom, that in order to rest we have to first….. fill in the blank with your endless list. Holy Schmoly. I. Do. This. All. The. Time. I make everything else so important to me and he sits patiently and says “I am ready with what actually, truly is important whenever you want to stop striving. Just sit and graze on my presence, Maria. That is what is actually important.” *insert deep sigh* If only we remembered that we are not in charge of anything important besides resting in Him.